


The One with the Secret Admirer

by crashingintothesun



Category: Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda - Becky Albertalli
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M, aka my two favorite things in the world, just a bunch of oblivious simon and pining bram, svthsa au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-06
Updated: 2017-07-06
Packaged: 2018-11-28 08:43:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,162
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11414316
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crashingintothesun/pseuds/crashingintothesun
Summary: "Dear Simon,"starts off the love note found in Simon's locker at work, setting off his journey trying to figure out the note's authororthe co-worker au that you never asked for but got anyways





	The One with the Secret Admirer

Simon has always been the kind of person to stay out of the spotlight, save for onstage in one of his many drama performances. He doesn’t mind not being the center of attention, in fact most of the time he prefers it- he swears that life in the spotlight is a guaranteed mess. So when Simon arrives to work one seemingly ordinary Tuesday night and a single sheet of paper falls out of his locker, he picks it up and glances over it curiously, his face scrunching up in confusion when he sees that it’s actually a note. Addressed to him.

 

“Dear Simon,

Have you ever wanted something so much that it drove you crazy? I’m talking ‘if I don’t do something now then I’m going to regret it for the rest of my life’ sort of crazy. Perhaps this is why I’m writing this letter. I know this is crazy; it’s the worst idea I’ve ever had, and I feel nauseated, Simon, positively nauseated, but I need to say this:

Everything about you drives me absolutely crazy. I love how your eyes light up when talking about something you’re passionate about; I love how your lip curls up when you smile; I love how disgruntled you get when your glasses never stay in place. I love everything about you.

I know this is forward and frankly impulsive, but I don’t care. I had to let you know.

Love,

Your Secret Admirer”

 

Simon’s heart thumps fast in his chest as he reads over the note once, twice, and a third time. His eyes always going back to the words “I love everything about you”.

 _This can’t be real_ , he thinks. _There’s no way in hell that this is real_.

His eyes are still transfixed on the note when the door to the break room suddenly opens and in walks Bram Greenfeld, one of Creekwood High’s soccer stars.

You see, Simon had only applied for this job at the local grocery store because one of his best friends, Nick, had encouraged him to. In Nick’s words, Simon should feel lucky to be able to spend every waking minute with him. Simon doesn’t think of it as lucky. With it being such a small town, there are many familiar faces from Creekwood High on the staff, hence how Soccer Star Bram ended up becoming one of Simon’s closest friends, much to Simon’s disbelief (it feels almost wrong to him to be working so closely to a guy who he has ogled from across the field at games). But when everyone has to put up with the same shitty pay and customers, they all form an unbreakable bond necessary for workplace survival.

“Hey,” he greets with a smile as he walks to his own locker. He opens it up easily and tosses his bag in with one swift motion. Simon thinks that he’s so graceful due to all of his soccer training. He (refuses to) think about how strong the training’s made him and the rest of the team and what it would be like to be pinned to the wall by someone with incredible biceps.  

Simon quickly folds the note back up and places it in his bag before closing his locker door.

“Whats up?” he asks Bram. “Did you finish the history homework?”

Bram shakes his head. “I haven’t gotten around to that yet. I’ve been sort of distracted lately with the playoffs coming up. Thanks for reminding me, though.”

“You, Bram Greenfeld, forgot about homework?” Simon teases. 

Bram smiles softly in response to Simon’s teasing, a hint of blush creeping onto his cheeks. “Some people actually have a life outside of school and work. We don’t all stay at home to watch Harry Potter.”

“Excuse you, but I only do that when they have the Harry Potter weekend on tv,” Simon defends. “And it’s not my fault if that happens to be, like, every weekend. Maybe if you agreed to come over and watch it with me you wouldn’t be making fun of it so much.”

“A movie marathon with you? I think I’ll have to pass.” A grin spreads across Bram’s face as he watches Simon’s smile turn into an offended look.

“You don’t know what you’re missing out on,” Simon tells him before walking out of the break room to go clock in for his shift. Bram watches after him, his hands fiddling nervously.

* * *

“So you’re telling me that somebody actually wrote you a love note and stuck it in your locker?” Nick asks the next day. Simon and his friends are all crowded around their lunch table, listening intently as Simon tells the story about the mysterious Secret Admirer.

“Yes!”

“Are you sure it was for you?” Leah asks as she picks at some of her food. “Maybe they got the locker wrong.”

“The note literally had my name in it, like, twice,” Simon tells her. And, _god,_ he literally can’t even with Leah right now. Simon sometimes thinks that it would physically hurt her to even pretend to be happy for someone.

“This is so exciting!” Abby gushes, her reaction the polar opposite of Leah’s. No surprise there.  Abby rests her chin in her hands as she looks at Simon, her eyes shining happily. “Who do you think it is?” Simon shrugs.

“It’s gotta be someone relatively new at work. I don’t think anyone who actually knows me well would think all that highly of me.” Simon doesn’t mean to come across as self-deprecating. It’s just that when you go through life always being the right hand man, the best friend, the bystander, you kinda just accept that maybe that’s how things are just supposed to be. You exist only on the sidelines, watching everyone’s story play out except your own.

“Why would you think that?” Simon turns to look at Bram, who's been awfully quiet throughout the entire conversation, only speaking up now. “You’re a great guy.”

“But the way this person wrote about me? There’s no way that they actually feel that way. It’s just...I feel like this person has an idealized version of me in their head. I’m not the guy that they want me to be.”

Simon’s friends all shake their head in disagreement.

“You really are great,” Nick repeats Bram’s earlier statement. “You’re a fantastic friend, you’re insanely talented, and you’re incredibly smart. Anybody would be lucky to have you.”

Simon can’t help but smile a bit at that. “Thanks, man.”  

Nick smiles and nods before taking a bite of his sandwich.

Bram softly chews on his lip and looks down, avoiding the knowing looks that his best friend Garrett is sending his way.

“Think of how great it’d be if you actually found out who it is, though!” Abby speaks up again. “Our group would be complete. Nick and I have each other, you have your mystery person-”

“What about Garrett, Leah, and Bram?” Simon asks, easily finding the flaws in Abby’s logic.

“If Garrett here finally man's up and asks Leah out,” Nick teases as he elbows a red faced Garrett. Leah abruptly stands up at that, picking up her food.

“I’m not going to sit here and listen to you guys discuss my life like I’m your toy. Also don’t say ‘man up’; it’s incredibly sexist,” she snaps before walking out and Simon swears in that moment she reminds him of a spitting image of his sister, Alice.

Everyone stays quiet while Leah walks off and it’s finally Garrett who breaks the silence. “Well what about you, Bram? You’d need somebody to complete the group too.” He looks at his friend with a playful smirk. Bram swallows his food followed by a swift kick to Garrett’s shin underneath the table.

“Yeah, he’s right!” Abby pipes up. “How come we never talk about your love life?”

“That’s because there is none,” Bram replies quietly as he brushes crumbs from his thighs.

The conversation then gets switched over to the usual school gossip about who is hooking up with who, and other pointless topics that Simon can’t bring himself to care about.

All he can think about is who wrote him that note, because whoever did, they seem to see a version of himself that nobody else does. But then again, there are times when Simon himself doesn’t even know who he is. Simon knows that he doesn’t exactly fit in with the general population of his school, which is why he never figures himself to be of any importance to anyone except his friends. This is why the note is so fascinating. Somebody looked at him and and actually saw him for who he is. They _loved_ him for it.

Simon just has to find out who wrote him that note.

* * *

 

“So, no love life?” Simon asks Bram that night at work as he’s helping him stock one of the shelves. Oreos. Simon’s favorite.

Bram bites his lip and shakes his head as he continues to mindlessly put package after package neatly up on the shelf.

“Did you want one? I know lots of available ladies,” Simon tells him, half joking. For some reason he just can’t picture Bram cuddling up with just any girl from around here. Bram seems to be the kind of guy who doesn’t just go chasing someone for the hell of it. He’s serious and focused, but also fun and a great person to hang around. Simon definitely likes working with him the best, though he won’t ever admit that to Nick.

He notices that Bram bites his lip extra hard at his comment, but settles for shaking his head in response.

“None of the girls here really catch my eye. I sort of have a specific type,” he finally replies. The sharper tone to his voice indicates to Simon that the conversation probably shouldn’t be continued, so he lets it drop. He changes the conversation to something light, making a joke at their awful manager’s expense; it’s something along the lines of “What’s the difference between a grocery store and Paul? A grocery store has dates. Get it? The food?” And Simon knows that it’s a terrible joke, but it manages to make Bram smile. And Bram is sort of beautiful when he smiles, Simon thinks.

 

* * *

 

The mystery as to who could have possibly written that note for him continues to plague Simon’s mind for days. It’s all that he can think about.

School goes by in a blur; the classes pass by in an instant; conversations happen without much input. He can’t focus at all, his head otherwise preoccupied with trying to make a mental list of all the possibilities of who could have sent him that letter. Simon goes through all of his co-workers, eliminating the ones who he knows for sure it can’t be:

Nick is a definite ‘no’. Not only is he dating Abby, but he and Simon have been best friends for years and if Nick had been in love with him, then Simon would have known by now.

He’s holding onto the hope that there is secretly another gay or bisexual guy among him at work so he rules out his female co-workers as well. Besides, everyone at work knows about Simon being gay so there is no logical reason as to why one of the girls would have written him. Simon continues to go through the list, ruling everyone out until he comes to one person:

Cal Price.

Cal is one of the many Creekwood High students employed with Simon, and he also happens to be a part of the drama club. There have been moments in class when Simon has caught Cal looking his way, only for his eyes to dart in any other direction when Simon glances at him. Cal’s face would flush bright red with embarrassment and he would then try to avoid any eye contact with him for the remainder of the day.

Drama people are also known to have a flare for the dramatic, and leaving a Secret Admirer note in his work locker would definitely count as dramatic.

 _It all makes sense that it’s Cal_ , Simon thinks. There’s no way it’s not. Except, Cal only works part time on the weekends, and so Simon won’t be able to really confront him about it at work for two more days. He figures that’s a blessing in disguise, because it’s going to take a few days to figure out how he would even start the conversation: “Hey, Cal. So you’re in love with me? Wanna go to the break room and make out?”

No, that’s definitely not going to work.

* * *

 

With the fresh revelation buzzing inside of him, Simon walks into work that night feeling a bit lighter than usual. He feels as if nothing can bring him down, not even the fact that it’s a short-staffed night so it’ll only be he and Bram left to close the store.

Working with Bram is actually some of the most fun that Simon has. Whenever they get paired up in a shift the time always manages to pass by faster because Bram is such great company to keep. While Simon’s on the register, he usually comes by to “clean” which involves him just standing by Simon and talking with him while keeping a broom in his hand to make himself look busy.

However, Bram doesn’t really talk to Simon as much as he just listens to him ramble on about school, family, and plans for the future. His eyes always seem to pierce right into Simon’s whenever he listens, and it’s not like he listens to people in a nosy way- he listens to people in a way that shows he cares, because he truly does. People like Bram are so rare to find nowadays and Simon feels lucky to be able to consider him such a great friend.

“So, you really want to stay in Georgia for college?” Bram asks curiously, his eyes looking around to make sure Paul isn’t anywhere in sight to yell at them for talking...again.

“Yeah, of course! I want to be able to stay relatively close to everyone. Plus Georgia isn’t too bad.” Simon pauses when he realizes that this conversation has been mostly one sided before speaking up again. “How about you?”

“I’m actually not quite sure, yet. It depends on which schools will give me a scholarship.”

“Oh, right. Will you have to audition for a scholarship?” Simon asks. Bram laughs and gives Simon this look that almost looks rather...fond? And Simon doesn’t know what the hell is going on but all of a sudden there’s a flutter of a few tiny butterflies in his stomach.

“You mean try out? No. They send scouts to watch the games.” That fond look is still on Bram’s face as Simon blushes from his mistake. “But if you’d like, I could always use some cheerleaders for good luck.”  
Simon laughs at that. “Yeah, okay. I’ll have to convince Abby and her friends to cheer for you.” He then watches as Bram’s fond smile turns into a tight line.

“Sure,” is all he says before walking away and Simon is left at the register, watching after Bram as the butterflies in his stomach turn into knots.

He doesn’t know what the hell is going on with his body today.

The rest of the shift passes by excruciatingly slow due to the fact that Bram is avoiding Simon and he has no idea why. So by the time the store closes and they’re left to clean up, Simon makes his way around with a mop to find Bram already mopping one of the aisles.

“Mind if I join you?” Simon doesn’t even wait for an answer before he starts from where Bram has left off, squeezing out the excess water before mindlessly pushing the mop around on the floor. The only sounds heard are the ticking of the giant clock mounted on the wall and the faint buzzing of the fluorescent lights.

Simon tries to break the silence.

“So….” he trails off, not really knowing what to say. Even if Bram isn’t the most talkative around him, it’s still easy to be with him. Simon doesn’t know why it’s so hard now.

“Do you have any ideas as to who wrote you the note?” Bram asks him suddenly. Simon looks over and notices that Bram’s got a white-knuckle grip around the mop handle.  

“Actually, I do have one,” Simon tells him. “You know Cal? He works the weekends with us? I have this feeling that it’s him.”

“Cal?” Bram asks, shifting his gaze to look up at Simon. “Didn’t he have a girlfriend last year?”

“He could be bisexual, Bram. Plus he’s in drama with me so we see each other quite often outside of work. It makes sense.” _And he’s pretty damn cute,_ Simon thinks.

“But you found the note on a weekday. He wasn’t working,” Bram points out.

Simon stops what he’s doing, mentally calculating the days to see if Bram is correct. As always, he is.

“But maybe he didn’t put it in on the day I found it; maybe he did it over the weekend but I missed it. I mean, it’s possible, right? That way he could avoid suspicion.”

At that, Bram just lets out a groan and stops mopping. “Simon, how could you be so daft?”

“I’m sorry?” Simon replies, utterly confused at Bram’s sudden outburst. Bram sighs and runs his thumb across the tip of the mop handle nervously.  

“It was me,” he admits quietly- so quietly that Simon almost doesn’t hear him. “I was the one who wrote the note. I am so freaking in love with you, Simon. How could you not know?” His eyes are boring into Simon’s, who is standing there in absolute shock.

Bram- Bram freaking Greenfeld- who Simon has tried (and mostly failed) to avoid thinking about for years in any way other than platonic because he refuses to fall for a straight guy, is _in love_ with him. **_Him._ **

The air between them lights up with a charged energy and Simon is still grappling for words- for anything- to say back, but Simon is at a complete lack of response.

When Simon doesn’t respond, Bram sighs and puts his mop back in the bucket. “I’m sorry that I’m not who you expected,” he mumbles before turning around and walking away.

For the next hour, Simon is trapped inside his own head while he cleans up his side of the store. He goes back through everything, all the lunch table and classroom conversations, all the group hangouts, all the late night shifts that they’ve worked together and Bram had never once indicated any feelings towards him. Except, _holy shit_ , he has.

All of the instances where Simon would catch Bram’s eye and they’d hold contact for longer than necessary; every time Bram accidentally brushed his fingers across Simon’s body as they passed by each other; all the times where Bram would deflect any conversation about his love life.

 _Oh god,_ Simon thinks. _I’m the world’s biggest idiot._

Now Bram- adorably cute, soccer star Bram- is just a few aisles down from him probably thinking that he’s messed their whole friendship up, all because Simon has been the world’s most oblivious teenager to ever exist. And it’s not like Simon hasn’t ever thought about Bram in that way before, because he most certainly has. It’s just, he always imagined that Bram was straight so he never even dreamed of entertaining the idea. 

And, because the universe seems to enjoy making a mockery of Simon’s foolishness, Bram is also supposed to be Simon’s ride home tonight.

_Fuck._

After both Simon and Bram clock out, they make their way to the car in silence. Simon spares a glance at Bram, whose eyes are focused on the car and Simon can’t help but think about how beautiful they look with the moonlight reflected in them.

The car ride back to the Spier’s is awkward and quiet. The charged energy from before has dissipated into a tension so suffocating that Simon feels as if his heart is going to explode. He’s mentally willing Bram to speak up, to say anything at all, but it’s to no avail.

When they pull up into the driveway, Bram puts the car in park but doesn’t move or say anything. Simon, however, isn’t one to just leave without saying anything, so before he moves to exit the car, he turns his head to say goodnight. It just so happens that Bram seems to have that same idea. Their faces stop within centimeters of each other and Simon’s eyes travel down to gaze at Bram’s lips. His heart is pounding in his chest, so loudly he’s sure the entire neighborhood can hear it. Before he realizes it, Simon is leaning in and kissing one of his best friends.

_And Bram is kissing him back._

Simon moves his hands to cup Bram’s face as he pulls his lips away ever so slightly, resting his forehead against his. His lips are turned up into a smile, which reminds him of what his Secret Admirer- what Bram- had written in his note. Bram smiles back, a soft laugh escaping his lips.

“Wow,” he whispers.

“Was that alright?” Simon asks, his voice soft and quiet. Bram licks his lips and nods.

“Kiss me again.”

So Simon does.

Bram’s hands make their way across Simon’s body to tangle up in his shirt as they continue to kiss and Simon’s never given much thought as to what heaven on earth feels like, but he’s absolutely positive this is it: Bram’s lips on his, his hands roaming over his body.

Suddenly, there’s a knock on the driver side window and they pull apart quickly, Simon moving his hand down to straighten out his shirt while Bram instinctively wipes off his lips. He then rolls down the window to meet a very intrigued looking Mr. Spier.

“Hi, dad,” Simon greets sheepishly. His father just gives him a look and Simon knows that it’s time to leave the car. He turns to Bram one last time and thanks him for the ride before stepping out.

“Hello, Mr. Spier,” Bram says, trying his best to put on a charming ‘I was definitely not making out with your son in my car’ smile.

“Good evening, Bram. Thanks again for giving Simon a ride. Drive safely, alright?” Before Mr. Spier turns to walk into the house, Bram catches a glimpse of a small smile on his face, so maybe they’re not in as much trouble as he supposes. Without waiting to find out, Bram rolls his window back up before pulling out of the driveway and heading home.

* * *

 

The next morning when Simon is eating breakfast, his parents walk into the room and his stomach fills with dread. He knows _exactly_ what’s coming.

“So you have a boyfriend?” his father asks. Simon shrugs.

“We haven’t talked about it.”  
“It looked like you guys were _talking_ quite a bit last night, though.” Simon’s face turns bright red and he lets out a groan as he moves his hands up to cover his pink cheeks, knocking his glasses crooked.

“Dad, please. Can we not do this right now?”

“Honey, if you’re going to have a partner then there are some things that we need to discuss,” his mother tells him. “We need to set up some ground rules.”

“I don’t even...Bram and I haven’t even… It was just a kiss, okay?” Simon stutters out before standing up and fixing his glasses to sit straight on his nose. “I need to get to school.”

 

* * *

 

As Simon walks into first period, his eyes immediately find themselves on Bram who is sitting with Nick and Garrett. He makes his way over to them, sitting down in the vacant spot within their grouping. Bram smiles fondly at him and Simon finds himself blushing because Bram really does have a beautiful smile, one whose beauty is magnified when you are at the center of it. Garrett smiles knowingly as he watches the interaction, while Nick watches in confusion. Garrett leans over and whispers into Nick’s ear, which causes his eyes to widen in shock. He’s about to speak up but their teacher enters the room and starts the lecture, thus saving Simon from a barrage of questions that he’s sure will come as soon as the bell rings.

Not much is different that day- the classrooms’ the same, the hallway is abuzz with the hum of the same conversations- but there’s been a shift in Simon’s world. And that’s the funny thing about life: a day can feel so ordinarily routine, yet nothing can be the same.

And as he tries to answer Nick’s questions as rapidly as they are being fired at him, Simon doesn’t mind being the center of attention for once.  

**Author's Note:**

> I'd just like to thank my Discord group for helping me get into Bram's linguistically correct mindset (because it's actually a lot harder than it seems)


End file.
